By Jake Sweltz
This post is inspired by Grantland’s Zach Lowe, who yesterday indirectly labeled the Clips “flop gods of the NBA.” I loved the phrase so much, I figured I’d hunt down some of the team’s Greatest (greatly exaggerated) Hits.
Solid start, Ryan Hollins. Way to kick things off on a good note. I feel like in another life Hollins would have made a great putty.
Chris Paul’s first entry here is quite a doozy. When I first saved this GIF to my laptop, I titled it “CP3 is a ham,” which pretty much sums it up. I love how DeMarcus Cousins doesn’t even realize what is happening until Paul is already in Act III of his performance.
Apparently, taking mild contact from J.J. Barea is equivalent to being flattened by rush hour traffic.
Or maybe CP3 was just having a “Joe Black” kind of day.
To be fair, Griffin really did almost take some serious elbow action to the face here. Still, the exaggerated back arch is vintage flop material. Plus, Nene’s subtle stink-eye after the fact is priceless. Also priceless? Blake’s “nobody saw that” recovery immediately following the botched flop.
But wait a second…this seems too familiar. Griffin couldn’t possibly have perfected a technique of this caliber on his own. I’ve seen it before. But from who?
Reggie. Effing. Evans.
Of course, how could I have missed it? Check out that crisp snap of the neck. Only one man could be responsible for such impeccable self-whiplash. And that arm-flailing, I mean, it’s just beautiful. Poetry in motion, a visual symphony of flimflammery.
Nice form here from Chris. The twirl is a strong flourish. It seems that before Reggie packed his bags for Brooklyn, he taught his former Clipper teammates everything he knew.
But why would you bother listening to a concert pianist perform Chopin when you can watch the maestro himself at work?
Clearly, the Los Angeles Clippers made a grave mistake when they traded away this virtuoso. Alas, he’s now cross country, flopping a new team into the NBA spotlight. And though Evans has recently been credited for other overrated, non-fraudulent skills like “defense” and “rebounding,” let us never forget where his true value lies.
Sir Evans has trained you well, young prince.
(all .gifs via Google search)